Steve Reeves (![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif){kind=small} temalyen) wrote,@ 2007-11-01 20:48:00 |
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Naked coworkers?!
Here's a story for you, I don't know what made me think of it.
Back when I worked for Voicestream (now T-Mobile), we had this really hot coworker. Her name was Bobbi Jo. It was one of those weird hick situations where two male names somehow become a female name. (After you mangle the vowels on the end of each.) I swear, if I ever meet a female named Alfred Howard, I'm going to kill someone.... because that's taking the "make two male names a female name" too far.
Anyway, the point is this: She was REALLY REALLY FUCKING HOT. Like, really super hot. So hot you do nothing but imagine her naked when you're looking at her. Anyway, like most people in that place, they realized the job was shit. Total and utter shit. Voicestream was a shitty company who didn't care about their customers. From what I understand, T-Mobile is just as bad. (Since it's basically just a renamed Voicestream.) Most people left after only a few weeks. As I recall, Bobbi hung around for maybe 3 months, which would have been a record if I didn't slug it out for 8. (And, even then, I didn't exactly stop working for them. See, I didn't work directly for Voicestream... I worked for now bankrupt company called Communications & Commerce. CommComm for short. Voicestream was outsourcing all their customer service work to us. One day, after I'd been there for 8 months, they just pulled all their business from us. I then spent the next 4 months working on a Providian (now Washington Mutual) credit card project. I may have bitched about Bank of America, but Providian was worse.)
Anyway, this junk is way off topic. Anyway, about a month after Bobbi quit, I was talking to a coworker named Eric. Eric had snuck off to a strip club called Climax. (He was married at that point, I think he went there under the guise of a bachelor party for one of his friends or something.) Who did he see there working as a stripper? Yes, that's right! The aforementioned Bobbi Jo. We had a conversation that went like this:
Eric: You've imagined her naked before, right?
Me: Yeah, sure. Everyone has.
Eric: Well, whatever that mental image looked like, it wasn't accurate. She's way hotter than anything you'd imagine.
So, at this point, it's like, "I have got to find a way to get there RIGHT NOW."
However, at this point, I was married. We were clearly heading for divorce by this point, so I didn't care. I didn't want her to find out (because then I'd have to endure lengthy bitching), but I wanted to go. I never did go because Climax is so expensive. Kurt & I went there as a bachelor party for me of sorts, and I easily ended up spending $100 there. (Well, sort of. He gave me a good bit of money. Probably at least $80. I know I spent a little of my own money, but not too much.) There's a $20 charge just to get in the building. Anyway, I could never save up enough money (I wanted at least $100), and I couldn't think of a decent alibi for going there. The club was probably at least a 40 minute drive from where we lived. That's an hour and a half in just driving, and I'd have been there for at least 2 hours. So, that's almost 4 hours I'd have to explain. I'd also have to leave at like 6 at night, as strip clubs don't really get moving until at least 8 or 9. So, I'd have to think of a reason for being gone from, probably, 6pm until 10pm. Not very easy. That made sort of wish I still worked at WalMart until 11pm. I could just work a half day without telling her and then could have gone to the club and been home by my normal time. (And hope that wasn't one of the nights when she went to WalMart while I was still working.)
Of course, now, I never ever go to strip clubs. (No, really, it's been years since I've been to one.) Unless I ever go to Las Vegas. Then I'm going to one every night. And gambling during the day. Boy, I'm going to end up broke as hell if I ever go to Vegas.
Here's a story for you, I don't know what made me think of it.
Back when I worked for Voicestream (now T-Mobile), we had this really hot coworker. Her name was Bobbi Jo. It was one of those weird hick situations where two male names somehow become a female name. (After you mangle the vowels on the end of each.) I swear, if I ever meet a female named Alfred Howard, I'm going to kill someone.... because that's taking the "make two male names a female name" too far.
Anyway, the point is this: She was REALLY REALLY FUCKING HOT. Like, really super hot. So hot you do nothing but imagine her naked when you're looking at her. Anyway, like most people in that place, they realized the job was shit. Total and utter shit. Voicestream was a shitty company who didn't care about their customers. From what I understand, T-Mobile is just as bad. (Since it's basically just a renamed Voicestream.) Most people left after only a few weeks. As I recall, Bobbi hung around for maybe 3 months, which would have been a record if I didn't slug it out for 8. (And, even then, I didn't exactly stop working for them. See, I didn't work directly for Voicestream... I worked for now bankrupt company called Communications & Commerce. CommComm for short. Voicestream was outsourcing all their customer service work to us. One day, after I'd been there for 8 months, they just pulled all their business from us. I then spent the next 4 months working on a Providian (now Washington Mutual) credit card project. I may have bitched about Bank of America, but Providian was worse.)
Anyway, this junk is way off topic. Anyway, about a month after Bobbi quit, I was talking to a coworker named Eric. Eric had snuck off to a strip club called Climax. (He was married at that point, I think he went there under the guise of a bachelor party for one of his friends or something.) Who did he see there working as a stripper? Yes, that's right! The aforementioned Bobbi Jo. We had a conversation that went like this:
Eric: You've imagined her naked before, right?
Me: Yeah, sure. Everyone has.
Eric: Well, whatever that mental image looked like, it wasn't accurate. She's way hotter than anything you'd imagine.
So, at this point, it's like, "I have got to find a way to get there RIGHT NOW."
However, at this point, I was married. We were clearly heading for divorce by this point, so I didn't care. I didn't want her to find out (because then I'd have to endure lengthy bitching), but I wanted to go. I never did go because Climax is so expensive. Kurt & I went there as a bachelor party for me of sorts, and I easily ended up spending $100 there. (Well, sort of. He gave me a good bit of money. Probably at least $80. I know I spent a little of my own money, but not too much.) There's a $20 charge just to get in the building. Anyway, I could never save up enough money (I wanted at least $100), and I couldn't think of a decent alibi for going there. The club was probably at least a 40 minute drive from where we lived. That's an hour and a half in just driving, and I'd have been there for at least 2 hours. So, that's almost 4 hours I'd have to explain. I'd also have to leave at like 6 at night, as strip clubs don't really get moving until at least 8 or 9. So, I'd have to think of a reason for being gone from, probably, 6pm until 10pm. Not very easy. That made sort of wish I still worked at WalMart until 11pm. I could just work a half day without telling her and then could have gone to the club and been home by my normal time. (And hope that wasn't one of the nights when she went to WalMart while I was still working.)
Of course, now, I never ever go to strip clubs. (No, really, it's been years since I've been to one.) Unless I ever go to Las Vegas. Then I'm going to one every night. And gambling during the day. Boy, I'm going to end up broke as hell if I ever go to Vegas.
